Things That Go Bump In The Night
by pastaaddict
Summary: Britain arranges a ghost hunt. He's accompanied by Germany, Italy, Japan and, of course, America. Warning: Nations freaking out!


**Watch a programme about a ghost hunt and decided to write an Hetalia version. Have fun!**

**I don't own Hetalia!**

_**Things That Go Bump In The Night**_

It was dark in the drawing room of the haunted house Britain had hired for the night. America, Britain, Germany, Italy and Japan all had torches at the ready and five spotlights from the torches shone steadily on the rug on the floor. Well, four were steady, one was dancing around as the hands holding it shook.

"America!" Britain admonished. "Will you keep your torch still!"

"Can't, dude!" America replied as he sat on a chair, hugging a cushion with his knees pulled up. "This is so freaking scary. Oh man! I think I'm gonna wet my pants."

"DISGUSTING!" Italy cried out

"Gross!" Japan muttered. Britain rolled his eyes. When America found what Britain was arranging, he insisted on being part of it. Britain just _knew_ America was going to be like this. Why did he do this to himself?

"Ve~ why are you so scared, Mr America?" Italy asked.

"Who's scared?" America replied, absolutely terrified. "I'm not scared. Who said I was scared?"

"You said it was scary."

"America has Phasmophobia," Britain replied. "He's been phasmophobic since he was a child."

"I think I had that once," Italy said. "The doctor gave me cream for it." Japan sighed.

"Italy-san," he explained. "Phasmophobia is a fear of ghosts." Germany raised an eyebrow.

"That knowledge would have been useful in WWII," he commented. "But why is he on a ghost hunt?"

"I ask myself the same thing," Japan replied.

"You guys were all doing this," America said. "There's no way I was gonna chicken out. After all, I'm the hero! Oh God, this is so scary!" And he buried his face in the cushion. Britain rolled his eyes again.

"America," he huffed. "Nothing has happened yet!" Italy shuddered.

"Ve~ that's good," he commented. "I'm scared of ghosts too." Germany face-palmed.

"This is going to be a long night," he sighed.

Everybody jumped when a banging noise sounded around the room. America gave a scream and dove behind the sofa. Everyone else followed the sound to the window and saw the silhouette of a tree branch against the glass as it pulled away and came back, banging against the window.

"It's just a tree branch, America," Britain said. "You can come out now."

"No freaking way, dude," came America's voice from behind the sofa. "I'm staying right here."

"Good grief," Britain huffed. "Some hero!"

Germany was wondering how the hell he had become involved in this and then he remembered that he had lost a bet with Prussia. He was never betting with Prussia again.

Italy began tapping him on the shoulder.

"Germany! Germany!"

"Ja," he sighed. "What is it, Italy?"

"I need to go to the little boy's room," Italy replied and waited.

"So?" Germany said. "You know where it is."

"But it's dark and scary," Italy whined. "It's haunted and full of creepy noises."

"Italy!" Germany said with a stern tone. "You're big enough to go to the bathroom by yourself. I'm not going with you to hold your hand. Or anything else for that matter."

"Vee~," Italy's shoulders slump and he gave a little whimper. Then he gripped his torch and left the room.

* * *

Italy crept slowly down the passageway, peering round furniture and through open doors that he passed, shining his torch into the rooms beyond. He stepped on a loose piece of flooring and gave a little scream when it creaked and he hurried the rest of the way, diving into the bathroom, locking the door and turning on the light.

Inside was a toilet, a sink and a shower with a shower curtain but more importantly no sign of any ghost. Italy breathed a sigh of relief. Speaking of relief …..

He used the toilet before fear forced him to, then washed his hands. He looked in the mirror and saw that his hair was messed up so he took a comb out of his pocket and began to tidy it up, avoiding his curl, of course, while humming _Marukaite Chikyuu_ to settle his nerves.

As he pulled the comb through his auburn locks, a movement in the mirror caught his eye. The shower curtain move aside and Italy saw a figure in black with glowing red eyes. He screamed all the way back down the passageway.

* * *

"GERRRRRRRRMANNNNNNNYYYYYY!"

Everyone turned as a terrified Italy burst into the drawing room with tears of fear streaming down his face.

"Germany, save me!" he cried. "Please, I don't want to dieeeeeee!" He threw himself at Germany who, through years of practice, managed to catch him, bride-style. For a moment Germany was stunned and just stood there with a trembling Italy in his arms. Then he came to his senses.

"Get off me!" Italy yelped as Germany dropped him. "Dummkopf !" Italy got on to his knees, wrapped his arms around Germany's waist and held on for dear life.

"Please!" he begged. "There's something in the bathroom! It was black and creepy and it had glowing red eyes! I was so scared!"

"Italy, did you forget to take your medication again?"

"I swear," Italy plead. "It was there! I think it was watching me when I was using the toilet."

"Oh man!" America said, still behind the sofa. "That'd freak me out!"

"Perhaps we should investigate," Japan ventured. "It's the only thing that has happen all night." Germany sighed.

"Why not!" he conceded. "It's better than just sitting around. Although, knowing Italy, it will probably turned out to be a bathrobe." Everyone began to file out of the room.

"You coming, America?" Britain called back. America peered over the back of the sofa.

"Go into a haunted bathroom!" he replied. "No way, man! I'm staying right here!" Britain shrugged.

"All right," he said. "But you'll be by yourself." And he left the room. America dove over the sofa and ran for the door.

"Yo, Britain," he called. "Wait for me, dude!" He caught up to the others as they moved down the passageway, passing a table with a blue and white vase stood on it and made their way to the bathroom.

* * *

The bathroom door creaked open slowly and the countries peered in cautiously. The light was still on. Germany stepped in and pulled the shower curtain to one side. The shower was empty.

"There's nothing here!"

"Ve~ it was here, Germany," Italy insisted. "It looked round the shower curtain at me."

"Well if there was anything here," Britain replied. "It's gone now." Suddenly everything went pitch black as the bathroom light went out.

"ARRRRGGGHHH!"

"American-san, please stop hugging me!"

The other countries flicked on their torches and shone them on America who had wrapped his arms around Japan and was holding on for dear life.

"Rock-a-byebabyonthetreetop," America sang at high speed, terrified. "Whenthewindblowsthecradlewillrock."

"Is he all right?" Germany asked.

"America-san was like this when he made me watch 'Ghosts of America' with him," Japan replied, struggling to free himself. "I still do not know why he watched it." Japan managed to free himself, sighing with relief.

There was a crash out in the passageway. America grabbed hold of Japan again.

"What was that?" Germany demanded. Japan just gave a muffled cry of distress as America hugged harder.

"Now I am gonna wet myself!" he cried.

"Well, you're in the right place for it," Britain smirked and began prying America's arm off Japan. "America, let Japan go! You're cutting off his oxygen! He's turning blue!" He managed to loosen America's arms enough for Japan to escape.

"Thank you, Britain-san," he gasped. Germany moved to leave the bathroom.

"I'm going to see what that crash was!" Everyone followed him out. Half down the passageway, the vase that had stood on the table was now in pieces on the floor.

"Ve~ How did that happen?" Italy asked, nervously.

"Perhaps one of us knock the table when we went past," Britain suggested. "And the vase just rolled off now."

"Possibly," Germany replied. "I'm going to get a dustpan and brush." He began walking down the passage.

"It's late, Germany," Britain called after him. "Leave it for morning."

"Ve~ Germany won't do that," Italy said. "He hates to leave things messy."

"Perhaps we should return to the drawing room," Japan suggested. "Before anything else happens." Britain shrugged and everybody began to move.

"A false alarm and a smashed vase," Britain huffed. "I'm disappointed with this ghost hunt."

* * *

It took a little time for Germany to find a dustpan and brush but eventually he came back to clear up the broken vase.

There were no pieces on the floor and the vase was on the table. Intact!

"What is going on here?" Now Germany was getting nervous. He made his way back to the drawing room.

* * *

Everyone turned when Germany walked in.

"Has the broken vase been cleared away?" Britain asked. Germany turned shocked eyes on his companions.

"It's not broken," he revealed. "I went to clear up the pieces and the vase is on the table like it has never been broken!"

"But we all saw it," Japan insisted. Britain stood up.

"I'm going to check this out," he said and left with the others trailing in his wake. They went to the table and, sure enough, the vase was on the table in one piece.

"But it was broken," Britain could not understand it. "We can't all have imagined it." America was fidgeting, nervously. That was when they noticed the drop in temperature.

"Ve~," Italy shivered. "Is it me or is it getting cold?"

"It's definitely getting chilly," Germany agreed. America lost it.

"It's a ghost, dude," he cried. "It has to be a ghost." And jumped on Britain, wrapping his arm and legs around him. Britain began to stagger.

"Please, America," Britain plead, straining under the weight. "You're not a cute, little boy in a night gown any more. Maybe you should cut back on the hamburgers!" He finally collapsed, America landing on top of him.

"Oww," Britain complained. "America, off, off, OFF!" America scrambled up, followed by Britain who put a hand to his back and stretched.

"Have you put on weight?" he complained. "Maybe I should cast a spell on you to make you hate junk food."

"Ve~ why didn't you use magic during the war, Britain?" Italy asked. Britain huffed.

"I did," he replied. "I ended up summoning Russia." Everyone winced.

"Very interesting," commented Germany. "But that doesn't help solve the mystery of the vase."

"Can we return to the drawing room?" Japan asked. "Even I am nervous now."

"This is freaking me out," America glomped Britain. "Let's get out of here!"

"Don't jump on me again, America," Britain begged. "You'll give me a hernia."

"Yes," Germany said. "Let's go back to the drawing room. I'm beginning to feel nervous about all this."

* * *

They returned to the drawing room using their torches, England struggling a little because America would not let go of him.

"Well, things are certainly happening now," Japan commented.

"I hope nothing else happens," Italy whimpered as he held on Germany's arm. "I can't take another fright."

"Neither can America," Britain replied, trying to get out of America's glomp. "Will you get off me!"

"Let's just stay here," America begged. "And not move, no matter what happens."

"I agree," Japan replied.

Suddenly the lights came on and began flickering. The Nations looked around nervously and then jumped when pictures began swinging on the walls. Object d'art flew from shelves and smashed on the floor and an unearthly wailing filled the room. Both America and Italy screamed and ran for the door, followed by Germany and England, yelling for them to stop and Japan followed them, not wanting to be in a haunted house by himself for fear of being possessed by the restless spirits.

When they were gone, a cupboard in the corner creaked opened and a mop of white hair with a yellow canary sat in it emerged. Prussia looked round, dropping the strings he had used to make the pictures swing and the ornaments fall from the shelves.

"They've gone, Spain." he called. Spain came through a connecting door with a microphone with a grin. He reached under one of the chairs and pulled out a wireless speaker.

"I can't believe that worked, mi amigo," he laughed.

"Keseseses, of course it worked," Prussia replied. "It was my awesome idea."

"It was nice to get my own back on England," Spain said. "I finally get my revenge for the pirate years."

"I like to mess with West, once in a while," Prussia revealed. "He's always complaining about me drinking all his beer." Considering how much beer Prussia drank, Spain thought Germany had a right to complain but said nothing about that.

"Where's France got to?" he asked, instead. They went out into the passageway and up to the table with the vase and knock on another cupboard opposite.

"You can come out of the closet now, France," Prussia called. The cupboard door opened and and France's blonde head popped out.

"Hon hon hon! Whatever you say, mon ami," he replied. He stepped out of the cupboard, leaving behind a dustpan holding the smashed remains of a blue and white vase along side a black cloak and a mask with red lights in the eyes.

"Putting dry ice in the air ducts was a touch of genius, mon freund," Prussia complimented. "Brought the temperature brilliantly. Almost as awesome as me! And good job with lights" France grinned.

"Their reactions were priceless," he laughed.

They wandered outside and looked round.

"No sign of them," Prussia smirked. "They must be halfway home by now. YES! I AM AWESOME!"

"The Bad Touch Trio are awesome!" France declared. He, Prussia and Spain stood in a circle and high-fived each other, laughing.

"What shall we do now?" Spain asked.

"Why don't we go see what Austria and Russia are up to?" Prussia suggested. "Austria's always fun to mess with and I still owe Russia for that Berlin Wall crap!"

"Sounds like fun," France agreed. "I'd like to mess with Austria too."

"I bet!" Spain commented as they moved off down the road.

Someone else came out of the house. A young man with blonde hair, violet eyes, wayward curly strand and carrying a polar bear.

"Why does nobody notice me, Kumakyro?"

"Who are you?" The young man sighed.

"I'm Canada!" Canada began to walk down the road, not seeing the dark shadow that had followed him out of the house.

**Hands up who knew America would freak out. Everybody? I thought so. **

**Hasta la Pasta!**


End file.
